Human connection saves more lives than perhaps any medical intervention out there. I wrote this line during a dark time earlier this year and it's been ringing through my head for the past few days. This weekend, I witnessed the truth of it in front of my own eyes as twenty strangers came together and healed - as human connection saved lives. Twenty women walked into a weekend as strangers, bravely opened up and bared their souls to each other, cried together, laughed together, danced together, conquered fears, discovered their self-worth, and left with friends and memories that will last a lifetime. There were breakdowns and breakthroughs. There were moments of falling apart, and without hesitation, being built back up by the nineteen other women in the room. It did not matter if you were 19 or 63, who you were outside of this weekend, where you came from or what your life path had been thus far - being human was enough. Regardless of any "defining" factors, there were nineteen women sitting beside you, loving you unconditionally, giving the space and support needed to rebuild, and cheering you on along the way. Witnessing these beautiful ladies form connections, heal, transform and leave with their heads held high, radiating a new-found confidence and spark for life, was one of the most powerful and moving experiences I have ever had. It will remain etched in my memory for the rest of my life. Yet, words cannot do this experience justice. For some moments in life, there are no words. It can make the raw vulnerability of them incredibly painful. It can make the magic of them overwhelmingly beautiful. These moments can reach both ends of the spectrum of good and bad, happy and sad, making and breaking. But irregardless of where they fall, these are the moments that alter our life trajectories in the most powerful of ways. These are the redefining moments. These are the moments of self-discovery. These are the moments of realization, when we finally understand what it truly means to come alive. These are the moments when we see what it is to be human in this world. These are the moments when we see how barriers don't keep people out, they fence us in. These are the moments when bonds can be both formed and broken. These are the moments that can make us feel caged and suffocated. These are the moments that can set us free. This weekend, I witnessed twenty women be set free. I witnessed twenty women find their strength and their courage. I witnessed twenty women cry tears of pain and tears of joy. I witnessed twenty women realize they are enough. I witnessed twenty women come to understand how life is not so much about what sets us apart, but about the bonds we share that bring us together despite our differences. This weekend, I witnessed human connection save the lives of twenty women - whether we are talking figuratively or literally. This weekend, I witnessed human connection save lives. And while no words can ever do justice to what we experienced over our three days together, I do have a few on my mind - a few I wrote during that dark time, earlier this year. To the women I just met, to the women I have yet to meet, and to the people unsure of how to be in this world, what I will leave you with are these words. These words I deemed instructions for the future. These words I wrote in the hopes that one day people would be better - the world would be better. These words, which I realized, were also instructions for myself. I love you all. Each and every one of you I have and haven't met. Keep shining. Keep soldiering on. Photos by Digidel I hope you will travel. I hope you will experience other cultures with open hearts and minds. And open your hearts to each other. Love each other. Be there for each other. And don’t let go. The shadows are a scary place to be alone.
Climb mountains. Watch storms. Find peace in the chaos of the world. There is something to be said for high, windy places - they bring a calm I cannot describe, and I hope you when you find these places, you stay awhile. They are my favourite. See the beauty in the everyday ordinary. Search for it everywhere. In the words of Shane Koyczan, “Try to understand someone else’s sense of what’s beautiful. They may help show you something you didn’t see at first glance.” And seek to understand the lives of people who live or behave differently than you. Spend time with people both older and younger than you. Interact with people without judgement. We do not know the struggles others are facing. We will likely never know each other’s full story. We all have secrets, hidden pains, and things that are too difficult to share. Be mindful of this. Be mindful of everything you can. And remember not one of us is perfect. Next, I’d like to ask you to fight. Fight for the things you believe in. Don’t let your voices be silenced by this world. Fight for increased funding for mental health resources and coverage. Please. The system is incredibly oversubscribed and underfunded. Fight for women’s rights and equality. Everywhere. Fight to abolish rape culture and for a change in the discourse regarding sexual assault. And do not shame sexual assault survivors, making them keep their trauma to themselves. Believe them. We did not want this to happen to us. We did not enjoy it. It was terrifying. Fight for modifications to the education system to make it more sustainable for the students who endure it. Fight for girls education worldwide. Fight for access to clean water and sanitation, in both Canada and abroad. You’d never believe the way it could change the world. Fight for science and sustainable living. Fight for those who no longer have it in them to fight for themselves. Greet the broken and suffering with open arms. Take the time to learn about the lives of people who have experienced completely different things from you. Believe their stories. Pay attention. And listen. Really listen. Human connection saves more lives than perhaps any medical intervention out there. I know it has saved me many times. Fight to live a deeper, more meaningful life. Please, just fight. For me. For you. For everyone. Be advocates for a better future because the world is not okay. Especially right now. And please, remember this: we are not as different from each other as we may think. We really aren’t. When I was a kid, I was deeply moved by the quote from Lion King II, when Kiara says to Simba, “Look at them, they are us. What differences do you see?” It caused a shift inside of 6 year-old me, and may be the reason I walked away from the societal norm for eight months when I was older to travel and live abroad in countries much different from Canada. It may be the reason my desire to keep booking flights to new places exists. Because at the core of our beings, we are all the same. Despite any cultural differences, we all want love, belonging, laughter and hope. We all want to be happy. We all want to feel like we matter to someone - like we are needed. We all want to feel heard and understood. If you’ve never heard me before, then read this over and hear me now: fight like hell. This world is incredible and breathtaking - please take time to notice that - but it could be infinitely better if we were all a bit more mindful of when to use our voices and when to listen, if we all knew the time to fight for what is right is ALWAYS right now, if we were all a bit more honest, understanding and open with each other and those from different walks of life than our own. So please: Be kind. Open your hearts. And really listen. Believe people when they tell their truth. Instead of pushing them aside, hold them closer - our lives are all difficult in individual ways. Question the things which do not seem right in this world or could be better. Raise your voices. Be advocates for a better tomorrow. And to all you quiet, reserved people out there: what you have to say is so incredibly important and profound. You are the observers of the world, meaning you can articulate the truth in a way many others cannot or do not even notice enough to begin articulating. Speak up. What you think and have to say matters. SO much. You will be the people to change the world. Believe me. To everyone: Fight like hell. Please. Because I know your potential is immeasurable.
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To all the women and little ladies out there: You are brave. You are strong. You are resilient through the daily fear, the assaults, the degrading comments. You are intelligent. You are light in darkness. You are creative. You are change. And you are so much more than enough. Thank you for the battles you brave every single day.
Today we celebrate us. And we acknowledge our allies. Our supporters. We are not here to practice misandry. We are here to speak our truths. We are here to bring down the walls of those who long ago removed the word feminist from their vocabulary in misunderstanding and fear of its meaning. We are here to celebrate all the wonderful things women do on the daily that go unacknowledged, miscredited, unappreciated. We ask to not be treated as less. We ask that our bodies not be objectified as playgrounds. We ask for recognition that there should be no need to give thanks - being treated as equal and with respect should be a given. That we should all be on the same team. We should all be on the same level. We appreciate those who celebrate with us. And we hope, that one day, our lives will not be a balance beam walk in a culture of scarcity. We hope, one day, you will all see us as enough, too. "What's the greatest lesson a woman should learn? That since day one, she's already had everything she needs within herself. It's the world that convinced her she did not." -Rupi Kaur |